Ladies, in having adult sex, whether it’s a one-night stand or not, there is one thing you should always keep in mind: If you do it with someone who is not thinking or not reflective on it, this is a red flag. Anyone who just dismisses something as intense as adult sex has zero respect for the other person or maybe themselves. I firmly believe that every sexual encounter warrants some reflection, although most of mine is filled with self-loathing and self-doubt.
Here is a peek at how my mind works right after having adult sex:
One-Night Stand
More often than not, one-nighters happen after a heavy bout of drinking has clouded my judgment. I absolutely hate that terrible feeling of waking up to realize that there is something different, and then it hits me like a rampaging school bus. I then realize that somebody random is in bed with me. If I’m unfortunate enough to wake up first, I lie in bed trying to piece together how I ended up there like a very difficult puzzle.
After a one-night stand, I always analyze my mental state. How did I end up doing this? Am I lonely? Am I losing self-respect?
Obviously, one-night stands are damaging to long-term partnerships because it’s an accelerated form of relationship. There is no courtship involved that leads up to sex. It’s difficult to get into a long-term relationship that’s not set on a comfortable pace that lets you go through a measured progression of unforgettable moments and lovely surprises.
Girlfriend
If you are in a serious relationship, you give more importance to performance. After sex, I always wonder if she enjoyed it, but it seems corny to ask her directly. This is the point where a debate starts in my head on whether she climaxed or faked it. In addition to this, I go over every tiny negative detail: What did it mean when she sort of laughed? And how embarrassing was that when the condom slipped off? It can only mean two things: either I wasn’t hard enough, or my penis was too small for it. And because I really don’t know if everything about it was good, I tend to dwell on the negative things.
I always try to be sensitive to a girl’s feelings right after sex. It’s rude to just roll off and leave after a guy “finishes his business.” It’s important to linger, laugh together, listen to good music, and yes, cuddle. I must admit that there is some psychological or physiological explanation as to why guys want to immediately move on doing something else as soon as they got off, but they should make a conscious effort to spend time with his woman after sex, even if they want to be at some other place.
RSS Feed